Friday, May 15, 2009

Seaside Lessons

March 3, 1894--The Sgt. Maj. Windy E. Bola, seen here with some young diatoms on their excursion to the coast of Cape Breton, where it was her supreme desire to impart on the youngsters the fine art of mirror signaling. Just as the camera was set up and ready to capture the fun, storm clouds rolled in, the rain started and a massive corvid took flight nearby. Nevertheless, a good time was had by all.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

His Holiness the Bahbra Binki

In this his only formal portrait, Bahbra Binki, renowned Sufi master and dervish with the most consecutive gold metals in whirling, is seen here in full regalia and looking pensive. When pressed for the meanings of the symbols within the portrait, Binki swore it was standard fare for a dervish of his rank, looked around nervously, coughed in a violent manner and begged for a lozenge. Soon after this was taken he was said to have run off with a massive leather-clad man who went by the name of Simkins--a strange character himself proported to have kept a small "humanoid" companion on a leash which screamed "gimme some!" unmercilessly. Binki was also the author of the acclaimed book of Haiku entitled, I Have Something in My Third Eye.

Old Dan

From 1855 to 1890, Daniel Berrimuck attracted throngs of enthusiastic onlookers to the circus to watch his well-known flag routine. It was simple to say the least and consisted of the performer merely marching around in small circles barely able to hold onto his prop, dropping it, stopping to bow gracefully to his audience, picking it up again and continuing on, all to the tune of Beethoven’s “Fur Elise”. The crowd cheered in elation with each move he made, clumsy or not. Dan always assumed he was the best flag performer the circus had ever seen, after all, listen to them! Never did it occur to him that maybe, just maybe, they were all cheering for the world’s only successful cross between a common grey squirrel and a highland cow. Ah well, it’s probably for the best. He continued to thrill crowds for ages, and through the years became known affectionately as Old Dan.

An attic full of antiquated insanity, darkness, humor and mayhem